How can crazy horses drag a secret from anyone?

I went to Tropical World on Sunday.
I haven't been in years!

It was shit.
I'm sorry to say it but it was. We got lost on the way there (that was actually the funniest part of the entire day) and had to pay 3 quid to walk around in a place that was too hot to breathe in. I had to pay 3 quid to look at some plants and have a woman continually run into the back of my legs with a pram while the kid grabbed my tights and legs in a way to get me to move so he could see the crappy plants. I'm aware that I sound childish and petty but I was stoked for this trip. If I couldn't go to the Deep, I figured I'd go to the next best place.
But no.
All the way round I was comparing it to the Deep.
The fact that there were no sharks was the ultimate kick in the teeth. I knew there wouldn't be any, but hey, if you can have crocodiles, what are a few small sharks?
The meerkats were cute though. But once again the pram woman ruined it when her kid headbutted me in the back of the knee trying to get round me.
Little bastard.

The Coal Mining Museum didn't fare much better.
We got there too late to go on the tour and so walked around. And all the horses had been put away so all we could do was read about mining. And we got locked in a little room with a load of weird dolls and it was dark and Will looked like he was gunna cry when we couldn't get the automatic door to work.

I'm not going to anymore museums unless they contain sharks. And are called the Deep. And I'm surrounded by the only people I know who can endure my socially unacceptable talk about sex and whatever rubbish comes into my head. And there are only 4 people who spring to mind. 1 who I'm seeing, 1 I'm related to and the other 2 are the greatest people on the whole planet!


I would also like to say that I'm offically disgusted at the internet as of Saturday when I came across a sexual fanfiction containing Predator.
Yes.
The whole weird mandible faced alien from the film of the same name.
It was horrible.
And that is the biggest understatement in the history of the world.
But you guessed it. To know it was horrible, I must have read it to the end...
Guilty as charged :D